|
Peaces Of Me++++
++++ The miles just keep rollin as the people leave there way to say hello I've heard this life is overrated but I hope that it gets better as we go |
Jan 30/03 Stacy and Amy slept in forever while I scanned a million pictures for them. Stacy had Jessie over in the basement for a few hours for a change of scenery. He has to wear the sling for six weeks. She hurt his shoulder when she hit him there poor guy was in a lot of pain. People always end up touching you where you are hurting don't they? I missed Nadia's call again today. She is eating with a group of people tonight but last night she was on her own so she ate in her room. Monica and I went out to find birthday gifts for Cory and Kate. Stacy went out after work with the girls again to film stuff for Coral's birthday tape. I worry about her driving when she is distracted like that and I mentioned it a bunch of times but it really worried me when Brent had the same concerns too. The pitching coach was really impressed with April trying to pitch with her sore ankle. She says that it shows that she is committed. Unfortunately April couldn't manage it because it was pulling her ankle too much. Brent worked this evening with Steve and he really enjoyed working with him. I picked them up at ten and Steve had a cake for us. Brent went out with him late. Annie at 1/31/2003 04:55:00 a.m. Nadia had to get up for 5:30 am to get ready for her trip. A Limo came by at 7 for her and off she goes! Brent started his job today and on the way at 7:45 I realized he didn't have any lunch money. Money has burned a whole in his pocket because Brent spent the last $10 that James gave him last night on the movies. When I got home I realized he didn't have breakfast either and he works 9 hours today. April's French exam was postponed because of power surges. Basketball tournament did really well. One of the parents from another team called Monica an annoying little pesky ass. I didn't say anything to him but I really enjoyed seeing how uncomfortable he was when Monica came over to me and he realized she was my daughter. They played well as a team and were friendly to the coach and he only yelled once at Ashley's feeble attempts at playing the game but then he yelled 'please'after! April's friends didn't show up after she cleaned so she kind of hung around with Stacy and Amy. Stacy, Amy, and April went out on the town filming for Coral's Birthday. Brent had some people in to watch a movie, the only different person there was Jen M. The place was a mess, so I wish he would try and clean we he wants people over. If everyone tried to clean one room we would have a clean house. Annie at 1/30/2003 03:53:00 a.m. I went to bed but I didn't get to stay there. At 1am I became aware that Brent and Stacy and gang were being noisy so we politely asked their freinds to leave. It is a weekday and they were disrupting normal routine on a work and school day for other people. Everyone was happy and we all said our goodbyes. Stacy came upstairs really slurring her words hanging onto the banister as she staggered up the stairs. She looked around through hooded eyes, and immediately threw up all over the rug, walls, clothes and floor, couldn't even make it to the bathroom. So it seems that she can't handle booze or she had more than she says. I just know that when she wakes up she is going to have lots of regrets because she is a girl who likes to be in control of herself. I watched over her after Brent had a shift till 2:45. Her mind is all messed up about her science tests, it won't shut down, she kept quoting equations and then would say how upset she is over Jessie and how she is going to see him lots and do some real dating. I can't believe that the girls drank during the week. When I left them for baseball I thought that Brent was with his friends and Amy and Stacy were in another part of our house. Stacy seems to think that Brent always drinks (am I missing something here?) but I guess I have to have more talks about drinking with her because is it my own son influencing her or his friends? Am I having a bad influence on her? That's what else she told me. But Brent said that only the girls and Brandon were drinking, no one else. Brandon was making the drinks and I have told Stacy not to drink anything unless she pours it herself. Apparently Amy didn't like her drink (which turned out to be doubles) so they switched. I don't know why Amy needs to look like a toughie and drink the stronger drinks only to end up trading it with my daughter. That really bothers me. Stacy asked for her drink to be made a certain way and that is what she should have drunk. It is almost as if Amy purposely had a strong drink made and then gave it to Stacy because Stacy rarely ever drinks. Was Amy trying to make the most of it? Stacy drank last week and I was surprised about that too. I know she doesn't do this with Jessie. Nadia was not impressed with Stacy at all, I can't blame her waking up to the sound of someone being sick near them. None of my kids have ever been sick like that on drinking before. (Not true, Brent got sick last year all over the hall and stairs and Crystal cleaned it up). Now I found out she didn't even like the drinks so that means she drank only to get drunk. I don't feel like such a good parent these days. My theories on drinking are being shot to hell! Stacy doesn't remember blaming anyone although she said that Amy influenced her because she didn't even feel like drinking. She is embarrassed and apologetic. I am sure she won't do this again. Hopefully Monica and April will learn by her mistake too. I think she now can see how a girl can get taken advantage of because she has no recollection of a lot of last night. You know maybe she is just being a typical teenager all of a sudden and is letting loose like I have always thought she has needed to do. No one should be thought of as perfect and I think a lot of people put her in that position. I hope people notice that Sullivan wasn't here so that no one can say Stacy was only there because of one person. Everyone seems to be watching what she is doing these days. It's not fair and it is putting a lot of pressure on her, especially with her brother Brent. ICQ messenger Annie - Hi Jessie How are you doing? I guess you have to type with one hand eh? Jessie - im doing good... haha yea it sucks Annie - our icq was causing alot of problems yesterday. We ended up installing it and uninstalling it about 5 times. When April went to go on it, it wasn't even on our computer Jessie - that's weird Annie - Stacy got sick last night. Her and Amy mixed a few drinks- a few too many. I didn't even know they were drinking and I am upset that they drank on a weekday and mixed their drinks, so she isn't feeling too well right now. At least if it had to happen she was safe at home. but I don't know if Amy got in trouble yet. Jessie -she always told me that she knows her limit so she will never get sick... I guess she doesn't Annie - I guess everyone has to find out the hard way at one time or another - some people more than others. Jessie - yea i guess so... Where were they drinking? At your house? Annie - In my basement. Booze is all of a sudden more available since Brent and his friends are 19 or soon to be. But just because you can get it doesn't mean you have to drink it. Jessie - what were they drinking? is she in bed still? Annie - sorry I had to make lunch they were drinking what Stacy called 'corkscrews' which turned out to be screwdrivers and then cranberry pop with vodka. I made Stacy walk the dog this morning because I usually meet up with Amy’s mom and I didn't want to talk to her because I didn't know what condition Amy was in when she got home. Jessie - oh so is she up now then? Annie - Yes she is back in bed with what you call a hangover. When she is human again I'll let her know I was talking to you ok? Jessie - oh ok tell her to come on here, as I will prolly be on most of the day, cuzx i have no life right now lol Annie - ok Jessie hopefully she will be better soon bye Stacy was mortified at some of the things she did last night. The contacts that she threw out of her eyes last night were her only ones, last night she said that she had others as she whipped them into the air and it turns out she left one in her eye all night. She dragged herself out of her hangover and saw Jessie at 5 for the movies and then stayed at his house till late. Nadia had Derrick over for fajita dinner, which they made and they were up for the evening. I wish Nadia would cook for Derrick so she would learn to cook, my kids are so unprepared in that way but she is the oldest so she should have some specialties. Nadia is all packed ready for her trip to Florida tomorrow. I am so happy for her, she is living her dream, going to the All Star Game and working for the NHL. I hope everything goes well for her. April went to Chelsea and wanted to sleep over but she has a French test tomorrow so no. Monica took the dog for a walk that ended up being about 2 hours. I had to track her down from Cory's and she was with Mitch and Cody. Letter to Stacy OK Stacy you just left and I have to talk to you but I can't, because I don't want to wipe the smile on your face off-so here I am writing you a letter. I watched you very carefully for the past couple of days and watched as you immersed yourself in your schoolwork. You are a good student, much like my brother. I admire you in so many ways and you know that. We have great relationship. But I watched you because I didn't know if you were contacting him, until I saw that you were studying that much and there was no way you were talking to him. I feel bad even thinking this way but Stacy you are an innocent an nievly think that guys like you as a freind when freindship is not what they really have in mind. I finally started to feel that you were not interested in Sullivan (Notice that I have not asked you that to your face because I don't want you to think you have to lie to me if you think you like him). Then while I was trying to sleep this afternoon, you asked me a question. While I tried to snooze, I started to focus on the innocent question you asked and it got me thinking hopefully on the wrong track but I just don't know. You asked, "What do you call the thing in Jessie shoulder?" (you meant the staples) Sounds innocent enough I know, but you wouldn't be asking him that, because you wouldn't want him to think you didn't care enough to know what to call it. Your friends and Brents friends all know about it because we have all talked about it enough in the last couple of days. Then it dawned on me that you must be talking to someone else. Sullivan. You know Stacy that I wouldn't think twice about you talking to him if it weren't for a number of things that happened in the past. I think you are still naive about guys. You have let other people undermine relationships in the past without the boyfriend knowing about it and it was very damaging and wrong. First Dezzie, and you do now realize that he just wanted what his buddy had, to try and see if he could wreck Jake's relationship with you. He teased you about him, tried to meet you at his house and even dissed Jess C. when he was amazed that he hadn't introduced you to a lot of his friends while at the same time he was trying to talk you into seeing him on the side, behind Jake (and his girlfriend's back, he wasn't introducing anyone to you either was he?) You know now from experience what Dezzie is like now. Darren tried to isolate you from people by playing the victim while talking about you behind your back. The more he teased and talked about you to the guys, the more you thought it was Jake and other guys saying things to get back at you. The week between Christmas and New Year's Darren phoned you repeatedly and said that he had time to phone you while he had hockey tournaments and he wondered how much Jake was phoning you as if to say he cared about you more than Jake. Poor Jake didn't even know there was competition with anyone and it was totally unfair of Darren to put both of you in that predicament. Both times it put you in the position where your reputation could be in jeopardy, not the guys but the girls - yours. You thought they wanted to be your friend. I helped you every step of the way to get out of that situation. It seems I dislike the guys who’s names who start with 'D' eh? Now here is Sullivan. I never wanted you to get to know any guy when you are drinking and that is how you got to know him. You might think that when you are drinking your true self comes out. It doesn't, drinking just turns people into something they are not- liars, and you now know that too from last night. You said what ever you wanted to say it didn't matter if it was true or not, you just said things to get your way. Please don't meet a guy and base your liking him when you both were drinking. Guys try to get girls drunk for a reason - because they are easier to get close to...for obvious reasons. Sleeping downstairs - that was very poor judgement on your part. If Sullivan were wondering if you were available or not your being downstairs when your bed was upstairs, would make him think that you were interested and Amy too for that matter. He must have been feeling pretty good at that point and your brother would be wondering 'What the .... is she doing?' What your brother thinks counts too you know. Put aside the fact that I just plain trusted you to do the right thing. It was all wrong. He has to be thinking about your boyfriend and what you feel about him. He must think you do things on your own without Jessie because Jessie wasn't with you so you can't care so much. Then when he found out Jessie was injured and you were hanging with Sullivan and not Jessie he would think either she is not serious about relationships, or she doesn't think much of her boyfriend. Don't forget I was home that night and I know how much you were hanging around with him. The fact that he has a girlfriend doesn't speak highly of him being here so much with you. Guys will lie and say they don't have a girlfriend or they are on a break or they are thinking of breaking up with them. All these are bull. Either you are with a girl or you are not. You don't go out shopping for a girlfriend when you have one. A break only means that you are shopping around for something else and if you don't find it you stay with the girl. (Would you want to be that girl? I sure wouldn't) If they are thinking of breaking up with them, then you know they will always be looking even when they are with you. And what happens - they immediately hook up with someone else. Think about it. Stacy I am not saying that you are interested but all the warning signals I get inside of me are ringing. Even if you decided that you liked him and would wait for a while and then go out with him, that now would be wrong. Because at that point everyone that Brent knows would think that something did happen between you guys that night when you were alone, and no one could convince them otherwise. So you see any attempts at a relationship would hurt you and going out with him would make you look bad to everyone, no matter how long you waited Every girl is allowed to look at what they think is good looking guy and make jokes with your girlfriends, that is normal and what is fun about having girlfriends. Even slight flirting is okay if you are with a crowd, never alone so that everyone knows that it is joking and nothing will happen. But when you have the opportunity to do something about it, that is when the line has been crossed. That is what everyone who knew you two were together until 3am is thinking - that Sullivan crossed a line. Whether something happened or not, you were put in a bad position and now people are questioning your integrity. To fix it, to make people know that nothing ever happened, stop talking to him. You can tell him you met him in bad circumstances- that you don't normally drink and that if things were said or if he misunderstood the situation you are sorry but under the circumstances he didn't get to know you the right way. The right way is not meeting you in a drinking situation, not meeting you when your boyfriend was sick, not staying night after night at your house watching and talking to you every chance he could get - not being near you when the whole household didn't realize that you were alone with a basic stranger. He met you when your boyfriend was so injured he couldn't risk going to that party so he doesn't realize what has even happened. The fact that this has even happened when Jessie was in his unfortunate situation would make anyone wonder, what you are thinking? Jessie needs you very badly now, he said today he has no life and he is only going to feel worse as the days go by. Just imagine if he even suspected anything. His world would be crushed. Like hitting a man when he is down. Many people, many many people would never forgive you and think so little of you. Your reputation would really suffer. You have an opportunity to see Jessie under different circumstances. You can now demand more of his time, even when he goes back to work he has to know that you won't take being lonely, that you are first choice always. He kind of bit off more than he could chew when he got a car, had to work and had rep hockey and I don't think he knew how to deal with it. Hockey probably wont be in his future anymore and if it is it will only be recreational and not take up much time. Now is the time you can tell him that you were so lonely you could cry, because it never has to go back that way and you never have to take it. You can talk to him about this and be positive and tell him how much you look forward to real dating the kind where you both decide on doing things with or without. If you don't want to go out with Jessie anymore and you are thinking of Sullivan, please know this. We don't trust him at all. He doesn't look good to us in any circumstance we have seen him in. He doesn't work, go to school, go home to his parents, respect our privacy, or respect your relationship or for that matter respect his friendships. I hate sending this, but I hate thinking this even more. The times I picked up the phone and realized that you were talking to Dezzie when you told me it was Jake would make me feel sick to my stomach just like I felt the other day when I figured out you were talking to Sullivan. You even tried to cover it up. That really hurts. You might say I don't understand but you don't understand that his actions should have been honourable right from the start and not so transparent to everyone else but you. His friends don't even want him near you. What should that tell you? If you continue to talk to him you are giving him the opportunity to sweet talk you, to undermined yours and Jessie's relationship, one of the strongest teenage relationship I have seen or heard of. Yes Jessie has made some mistakes, but as of last night you have a better understanding of it and now you know how important it is not to drink to that point. Both of you have now been through that now. Sometimes I think you are wondering about your relationship with Jessie, if it is working or if you are happy with the way it is. While he is recovering you can change the things you don't like. Make late minute plans with him, invite him over on the spur of the moment, do things you don't normally do. Try to get him to know us more. Play pool with him have Coral and Shane over as a couple all before he has to start working again. When he does work make sure he knows you want more time with him, somehow, even at lunch every now and then. If it doesn't feel right after trying everything you can to make it right maybe it is time for you both to move on. Not by getting mad it him for things he does wrong but by trying everything you can think of to make it right. If it doesn't work out then maybe you can part as friends. If you always get mad at him for things you will part as enemies. It is all up to you. Don't let one friend try to make up your mind one way or other. Everyone of your friends will have there own selfish reasons for wanting you to go out with him or not- use your own judgement. Love ya, mom Annie at 1/29/2003 04:48:00 a.m. Woke most of my kids up for 6:00am, Monica for homework, Stacy to study and Nadia to get ready for skating! Stacy snapped out of study mode at 7:30 by shaking her booty and getting her freak on. When we were discussing who puts hair on the wall of the shower she demonstrated how it gets there by smacking her head against the wall. It broke us all up. Thank god the studying is over and we can turn up the volume up on our living! There has been an Internet worm that is shutting down major business. That is what is going on with Brent's school so he still doesn't have any classes. Nadia was out all day with Derrick and they went to a concert for David Gray. Stacy and Amy spent the day together shopping after their exam. Stacy bought a cute coat and very nice matching clogs. JoAnne, my childhood friend lost her mom to cancer and unfortunately also lost her husband to brain cancer in May. I feel so bad for her her life has been hard. Her son is not in the picture, a huge disappointment to her she explained his absence by stating that he is just an evil person. Larry, her brother lost his steenage son a few years back when he fell asleep on a railroad track and was hit by a train. That family has had more than there share of sorrow. Now her father is depending on her too much so it is like she is being a parent to him. As with most funerals, the trip happened to turn out as a social event for people whose paths haven't crossed for many years. I met another girl from high school, not someone I was close too by any means, but when you are all from the same school, hey, there is a connection, right? We were bonding! She was saying how a guy from school she had bumped into recently impressed her and how she would like to see him again. All these women I knew as girls and they are all suddenly single again for various reasons. After talking and comparing notes it was obvious that I was being inched out of the conversation for no other reason than I was a happily married person and they weren't. They all had something in common, loneliness. I began to realize that the man they were all talking about, I knew; he was one of my daughters’ coaches. Suddenly I was part of the conversation again, they all wanted to get together with me, strange how that works. I said I could get them in touch with the guy so we all exchanged emails. Brent had Brandon and later Steve over. We talked for quite a while as Brandon is very entertaining and good natured. James and I had a drink with them until we ran out of mix. We let Brandon and Brent take our van to get some coke for us. Earlier in the day Steve's car broke down in Orono, Rich came to help him but ended up in the ditch. They were all kind of frazzled over it. James and I took Monica to baseball practice tonight and she had a lot of fun. They have a game called protect the wall and half are in front of one wall, the other guarding the other wall. They throw the ball trying to get the ball past everyone. The first one the ball passes is out. Monica loves this and every time she got the other team out before anyone got out on her side. They switched Monica over to the other side and it was a one-woman show, she was diving and it looked hilarious. Later more of Brent friends came and Stacy got back from Amy's so they hung out together. When I came downstairs I saw that Stacy's face was red from drinking. She said that she only had two drinks but I don't know about that. Stacy and Amy were loud and obnoxious; no one else was like that. It really bothered me that she would find it necessary to drink with them. She doesn't normally even want to drink but I would have liked to know in advance if she is. Annie at 1/28/2003 04:47:00 a.m. I had the weirdest night. I thought that one of the volleyball mothers asked me to wake her up at 6 and I was trying to decide if it was a dream or reality. I finally figured out at 6am that if it were true, then she would have given me her phone number! Brent got home in the morning. He had been up all night at the Alexio's with Dan playing computer games. Brandon's younger brother took his moms van out with only a g1. We went to moms before she left to Florida for tea and toast and after went to Mark and Carrie's to see how James's finger is doing, as it is still very swollen and the skin is now irritated. When we got back home April was in the living room with Stacy and didn't look too happy. Stacy had got April out of bed and was forcing her to study! Good for you Stacy! I went out with Nadia and bought her some clothes for her Florida trip. They are all long sleeved but she says she is going to be in an arena so she will be dressed properly. I really wish she had lost some weight. I hate to buy her clothes that size. I would rather buy her really nice beautiful clothes that would match her beauty. Mario and Hannah invited us to there place for the Superbowl but Stacy had so much studying that we went only for a short while. She seems to be trying to stay at home more and more. I don't know if it really was that she had too much homework or she feels uncomfortable being there, I don't know. She didn't sit with Jessie again, his mom did until I motioned to Stacy that she should be with Jessie. James was outnumbered at being a Raider's fan and for a while we kept getting phone calls when The Buccaneers got their touchdowns to rub it in. Jessie has about an 8-inch scar on his collarbone with 19 staples in it. He is on Tylenol 3's. Annie at 1/27/2003 04:44:00 a.m. I can't believe that I fell asleep last night around 7 in my clothes and woke up at 6am. I remember Stacy waking me up to tell me she looked after Jessie for about 3 hours after work but that's about all. Monica had her volleyball tournament which lasted until 9:30 so we were there for 13 hours. They were seeded 11th and they ended up in 4th place. We were the only club that had two teams to make it to the finals our other team come in 2nd. In the morning they weren't serving well but they only lost two games but most of them were very close. We beat the number one team, the team that got the gold, so we had an incredible day. We went to Don Cherry's, took April who was bored out of her mind all day, and bumped into Stacy's ex track and field coach. He wants to help Stacy get into the University that she wants by mentioning her to the Track coach. He said that it could definitely help her chances at getting in. He said that he would take Monica for Hurdles on a trial basis to see if she likes it. Why does Steve have so much to say about Sullivan? I think Steve still likes my daughter but Brent is getting mad and I think Steve is taking advantage of that and saying more than he should about it. They only talked, nothing happened. Sullivan hasn't gone out of his way to be near her, Brent has his friends here and Sullivan is one of them, plain and simple. Stacy has hung out with Brent and his friends ever since Jessie and her started to have problems, about a year ago, so Steve shouldn't keep harping on it, it is over and done with. BUT when they do hang out, it is Steve who is always taking care of Stacy, taking care is not the right word. Steve likes Stacy. Annie at 1/26/2003 04:19:00 a.m. OK, it is my job to worry and wonder about my kids but what is Steve getting so steamed about? Brent told me that the guys were disappointed about Stacy, which is kind of unfair. Personally I can't see anyone but Steve saying that. Brandon is so easy go lucky that he could care less what anyone does. He wouldn't care what she did or didn't do. Right from the beginning Brent said they were just talking, no big deal. Even if something else had happened, it is not there business, maybe Steve's, he is obviously still interested in her, but he should keep it to himself. She shouldn't have to live up to the high standards when clearly other kids her age don't. They only talked for Christ sake and even if they had not just talked what business is it of theirs to make any kind of judgement? Everyone makes mistakes and who is to say it is a mistake? Maybe this is the person she was meant to meet. And maybe this was all totally innocent. They only talked, it is not a sin, so why is everyone acting like it is a sin? Why am I? I might just think I know what Stacy thinks and I really have no idea. She has never disputed before that we think on the same line, my dad felt the same way about me, and I did too, I felt that I always knew what he was feeling. Steve was upset about what they perceived as happening and said that if Sullivan did anything he is going to get beat or something because even though Steve is a friend with Sullivan, he works with Jessie and respects him. Stacy said they only talked, nothing happened, that she didn't come downstairs, she was already there studying, and she is upset about what people think about her. She says she wouldn't do anything to hurt her relationship with Jessie and I believe her. Maybe she is feeling lonely for what her and Jessie should have but she will now have more time with him because he won't have hockey anymore and he needs time to recover before he can work again. Anyway it is history, everybody thought something was happening when it wasn't. It does not excuse Sullivan's behaviour at all. See I am making a judgment against him again, what should I be thinking? Watched a movie with Brent's friends while Brent went out to the bank with dad. They must have had a lot of banking because they were gone for hours. I really like Brent's friends and I feel comfortable with them. They were all ticked about Sullivan and I was very vocal about it. Dan said that he has known Sullivan since grade nine and that is the way he is. I don't know if he meant that he hits on girls or that he stays at people's houses? Either way it didn't say much for him. Steve doesn't want Stacy near him. Sullivan is trying to find a way to come to here this weekend and no one wants him to stay at their place. I don't think they should be acting on this rather just let it be known that he won't be coming to our house, I don't want them to gang up on the guy. Sometimes Steve's concentration wonders off in a conversation and then he reflects on something that happened to him as a child, and it usually is sad. I guess he had a rough childhood. He moved many times as a child and his home now is where is has been the longest. The people he met at his last school treated him as if they had always been there and he feels good about this area. Brents friends are old enough for me to ask some unanswered questions about things in there past so I asked the boys who it was who got so drunk that they almost drowned in the creek and surprise, surprise, it was Steve, that is one of the reasons he doesn't drink very often. I always thought that it was Brent or Adam. I told Dan that everyone thinks he spent mucho dollars on getting accepted to many universities and it bothered him so much that he questioned April and Stacy about the rumors they had heard at school. It ended up being Steve who applied to a lot of Universities. He kept looking at Stacy who had a big smile on her face and said that his mom made him. Poor Steve he must have thought it was gang up on Steve day! Stacy studied all day, she is good at that, like my brother Mark was. April's ankle is a lot better today. She phoned the school to do her exams that she missed. The Basketball Coach showed Monica a letter he got from a parent accusing him of saying things that Monica didn't hear. It is probably Colleen, she has had a hate on for him since Track last year when he wanted all the kids to stay on the bleachers and she had them parked by the track Annie at 1/24/2003 11:37:00 p.m.
I am writing this when I am upset but I have been awake since 3am, which is when Stacy went to bed. James went downstairs in the middle of the night and found Stacy up with Sullivan sitting at our table with Brent asleep in the family room. James was VERY upset, wanted to boot the guy out, it was the middle of the night but he is from Scarborough and it is freezing out. I was awakened to James scolding Stacy, he addressed the night Amy and Stacy stayed downstairs all night too, which I wish we had done earlier. This is so uncharacteristic of Stacy, even to study she will study all day and all evening but she knows to get her sleep at a reasonable time. She said that she was not tired. Then she said she was hungry, but we all know that she doesn't eat in the middle of the night, she is too disiplined. I think Stacy is infatuated with the attention this boy is giving her but James says that I am not giving Stacy enough credit, that she wouldn't do anything like that especially when Jessie is in his predicament, she would never start something up when she already has someone, that would be so awkward. I don't think James realizes that Jessie and Stacy have been in trouble with their relationship for a longtime and that she hasn't made any moves anywhere else because she didn't want the attention, she was comfortable with people thinking her and Jessie had something special. It infuriates us both that this guy has parked himself at our house for the third night and is obviously moving in on Stacy. He has not been asleep at his home in four out of five nights so he is not very good at the family life is he? I feel like a hypocrite even writing that because my own son stays out way too much so Brent doesn't care about his home life or are they just at that age where they have to do what they think they have to do? James says that Brent has let a bum into our house. To me, the dangerous feeling I have about him is that he wants Stacy, or that I think Stacy is attracted to the attention he is giving her when her own boyfreind has not been paying attention to her for a long time. I am scared about this. We said that we wanted all the kids out of our house last night because it was a school night around 12, music down at 11 but Sullivan stayed anyway without us knowing or maybe Brent invited him, I don't know. Brent knows we like having kids over but on a weeknight you should tone it down a bit and end it at a decent hour. We are being more than reasonable. Monica was all upset that Brent had a friend over this morning again because she does a lot of her homework in the morning with all of the sports in her life, she has to find the time to do her school work and morning seems to be the best. She doesn't like to go down and turn the lights on them especially when she is not dressed. Both James and I don't know what to think about this boy. He has made himself at home in our home, doesn't work or go to school and what about his home life, or lack of it? If he knows Stacy has a boyfriend then he shouldn't interfere, wait, he does know because Brent and I were talking about Mario, Brent was going to go there for a haircut and Sullivan said he would go for a haircut too for something to do and Brent said that Mario was Stacy's boyfriend's father. If Sullivan does like Stacy he has no business trying to court her in her own home, which is an invasion of her privacy. It would also be using Brent to get to Stacy. This morning Brent told me that he tried to stay up because of Sullivan and Stacy and that is why he was on the couch, so he was concerned too. He was downstairs when he heard them talking upstairs so he went up and made something to eat and finally fell asleep even though he didn't want to. Brent says that Sullivan has a girlfriend. At one point they actually wanted me to drive Sullivan home but I am so upset about this whole thing that I can't even look at him. He left about 2:30. Brent's friends said that they were disappointed in Stacy in regards to Sullivan, they all held her in such high esteem, Steve was even telling me how much he thought of her at the The Doobie Brothers's party. Although she didn't do anything everyone saw what was happening. He had no right to put my daughter in that position and move in to her own house to pursue her. I am so afraid for Stacy. Louise has mentioned Sullivan enough times that I know that Amy has a crush on him. I don't have the heart to tell her what has been going on. If Amy knows anything about what happened her feelings must be hurt because he was being very friendly with Amy, my family saw it. Everyone has a little fantasy and I hope Stacy didn't wreck it for Amy, not that anything was going to happen but it would be nice if Stacy noticed that Sullivan was flirting with Amy and was happy for Amy I really don't know what to think, what the hell is going on? I tried to explain to Stacy that he was one of the three guys that Crystal and Brent tried to keep away from Stacy last year. They were saying things that Stacy just blocked out and Crystal and Brent twice tried to get Stacy out of there. I thought that she had to learn to handle guys like that so I kept sending her downstairs. I reminded her of how Steve backed off when Jessie came back into the picture and how Jess C. didn't try to go after her even though he told her he had feelings for 'someone' but he wouldn't interfere with her relationship. I have never once asked Stacy about what her feelings of what happened was, rather what other people saw and what they saw was Sullivan going for it. She said that she was mostly with Steve, that she was not with Sullivan earlier in the evening and she only talked to him later at the tabel when she was studing with her books in front of her face. I don't know, is she the only one who can't see this or is she so used to Brents friends protecting her from everyone else that it just seems normal to her?. She says that she is with Jessie and that is that. I interpret that statement different than most people would. Jessie is safe, nothing happens between them and they really don't have a girlfriend/ boyfriend relationship. He is safe because no other guys try for her and she doesn't have to go through what she went in grade 10 and now Sullivan is near and her feelings are different, he is not safe, he is giving her feelings that don't feel safe at all, to her or to me I can see it. If Stacy had of been older, I would have steered her away from her relationship with Jessie because it wasn't growing and in a relationship that is going somewhere you need to feel all the things, passions, pain, pleasure, everything. But I liked the fact that I didn't have to worry about Stacy. Stacy decided a long time ago to be aloof and inaccessible to Jessie and because he didn't know how to handle it or because he loves her so much and is afraid to approach what the problem is he has just let it slide too. But I liked the idea that she was safe from other guys, guys that she would have no clue how to handle. I even joked with my close friends that it was the perfect relationship for a parent to have there daughter in because they barely saw each other and when they did his parents were with them. So they weren't in the position to 'do' anything. If she kidded to her friends about Sullivan that is all right, it is normal to notice guys, but there is a line. I hope for everyone's sake that it wasn't crossed. Jessie and her have to change there relationship and I think the change will be to end it, but not by introducing a new relationship like this so soon. It is amazing that all my speculation about this so-called relationship and Stacy has not acknowledged it at all. The only thing she will admit to is that Jessie and her are in trouble and have been for a long time. She has made no secret of that from me for about the last year. With the exception of Nadia my kids were all at home today. The network was down at Centennial, Stacy went in for psychology and then came home to study. Monica worked on a project all day. I kept April from her exams today because she was so sore from the crutches. Some of her friends came over to visit her in the evening. April just hates the crutches and is trying not to use them. Stacy walked the dog this morning with Amy which was a treat for me since I didn't get out of the house until picking Nadia at the go train in the evening - lazy eh? Late at night I realized that Stacy was on icq with someone and it was Sullivan. She told him that we were all upset at what people thought had happened and that it was a mistake that she was downstairs when he was (I think that is what she said). She said she wasn't going to talk to Sullivan anymore and took him right off her icq list. She was upset about the whole thing and wanted to talk about it to me, which was very mature of her. She said she couldn't sleep until we talked it out. Annie at 1/24/2003 04:26:00 a.m. I went to see The Coach this morning about the little rebellion. I told him that it happens and he shouldn't have even found out about it because it was being resolved on its own. I said you needed big shoulders to be a coach and that girls that age were very dramatic. I tried to show him how to turn it into a positive situation and that he should pick out a good point for each player and be as positive as he can be. I was hoping that if he acted differently than they expected that it would have an impact on them but he lectured them for an hour and a half anyway so I guess it didn't do any good. He said that he might quit coaching even leave the school. He gave his life history on his marriages and sports. We went to lunch with Dave and Marita, first time this month so we are doing good at not always giving into restaurant temptation. I had some wine and unfortunately fell asleep at Marita's after. I took April to the doctors and he says that she has to get the swelling down before we can decide whether to x ray again. It is grossly swollen on both sides of her ankle and is black and blue. April had two needles and her finger dry iced so with all her boo boos plus the soreness of walking on crutches she must feel like mess. Sullivan stayed overnight again and it is concerning me, I don't know his agenda. I don't think he has a job, doesn't go to school, what does he do? I don't even know how he gets out here from Scarborough, I don't think he has a car. I think I am uneasy about him because of Stacy. Even though she has never said a thing about liking him I have never seen her talking so much to anyone before. I get the feeling that she feels safe to talk and maybe even flirt with him because he is taken. But he might just see it as she is acting available to him, even if she does have a boyfriend. I wish I knew what she is thinking. Monica was on the computer with Alan and I told her she shouldn't be talking to him and she said "I know, I am just telling him that I can't talk to him like this anymore, everyone is getting the wrong idea." so I guess something has escalated and she is realizing what is happening. I hope it is not too late and ruin things for her and Cory. I wouldn't want them to end on terms where he feels that Monica betrayed him. I don't even think she realized that it was happening even though I was telling her it was. I think she thought she could handle it. email to Jessie's mom Hi Hannah I phoned earlier but you were at hockey and I don't want to disturb Jessie if he is sleeping. I hope everything goes well tomorrow with Jessie's operation. We will be thinking of him. Brent got a job at No Frills and they were telling him that he had to hire 7 people to replace the kids who were sick or injured. He mentioned that two of his best workers had been injured. He told Brent of Steve's injury in dairy and then said that one of his best workers who will take all the hours he can get, and is a real hard worker just broke his collarbone. At that time Brent said, "that must be Jessie, he is my sister's boyfriend." It is nice to know that they hold Jessie in such high regard! Take care! Annie Brent has his friends over too late and it is distracting our family from normal school day life at our home. Amy and Stacy have been studying here and they were distracted enough to join them for a game of cards?? I haven't seen Stacy play cards, not that I don't want her to, I do, but I don't even think she knows any card games besides the little juvenile card games she knew as a child, she has never had an interest in learning the adult card games. Annie at 1/23/2003 04:12:00 a.m. Brent got a job at No Frills. Yes, yes yes!!! He will be working in the dairy section with Steve. Brent was telling us that the boss was saying that Jessie is his most valued employee, takes all the hours he is given and is very much missed since his injury. When we were bragging about Jessie to Stacy she got a weird hurt look on her face. She had complained that Jessie was working too much for him to see her and I guess now it looks to her like he had a choice in it. I wish he never got his car. It is like he has to work all the time just to pay for the car. I think Stacy's feelings are really hurt about it. April had 3 exams today and we couldn't even let her try, shw is not good at all with the crutches. I keep telling her that if she does too much that her arms and hands will really hurt as well as her ankle, which is pretty ugly. James had to get a note from Mark because you need it when there are exams involved. Monica had a basketball tournament tonight. That Alan guy was there. I don't know why people say he is a Wigger, he looks like just any other grade 8 to me, I guess it must be his attitude. I was right about him, he is showing Monica a lot of attention and Monica was quite happy to get it. Parents were looking at her and then me, raising their eyebrows because they know she is going out with Cory and Cory was timekeeping the game. What a stupid situation to be in and I told her to get away from him if she didn't want Cory to be upset. Sometimes girls get a little attention that is not from their boyfriend and it goes right to their head. Its like they crave the attention that a guy first gives you when he will do almost anything to get you to notice them. New guys and the attention they give you can cloud the way you feel about your boyfriend but it is all fluff, she doesn't even know the real Alan. In their time in between games the Basketball team rebelled against the coach. They signed a petition and five of our girls wouldn't sign it, Monica being one. I was proud of Monica for not getting caught up in that kind of crap, no good can come of it. They got other kids to sign it too, and then they decided to destroy it but the coach had already realized that something was going on and drilled the kids about it. He cornered the girls and got Monica and Kayla and her mom and me were both upset about it. Now the kids think that each other ratted on the others. The Coach was visibly upset, told the kids he might quit coaching and leave our school. The kids left a huge space between them and the coach and I was impressed that when Monica was on the bench she sat right next to him. She is a peacekeeper. I met my old school freind Ann in Pickering tonight at the Blue Dog and we had a good time. I found myself at the bar waiting for her but I wasn't as uncomfortable as I thought I would be. It was not as much reminiscing and it was an exchange of ideas. She has 4 kids too. She looks good. Annie at 1/22/2003 04:26:00 a.m. On my morning dog walk with Amy's mother she mentioned that she knew a guy named Sullivan has been at my house and that Amy said what a good looking and nice guy he is. I found myself saying that he looks mother approved, but I don't really trust him. I feel bad about saying this and I don't even know why I said this, but I have an uneasy feeling about him, or maybe it is because I think he likes Stacy, he doesn't have the boundaries that a guy from our neighbourhood would because he doesn't know Jessie... but then I know he has a girlfriend...I don't know how I feel about him, he just feels dangerous to me and it is because of Stacy. All the girls obviously have noticed him so he must be sending out signals. I hope I didn't wreck it for Amy if she likes him, but it makes me feel even worse that Stacy and Amy stayed down stairs with the boys. Amy is under my care when she is here and I would never let them be in that position knowingly. I just trusted that they would come up when it was time to go to bed. It would be interesting to know exactly where they all slept downstairs that night and who slept near whom, I guess that would tell the whole story. Things are slowly getting out of control here. I was at Monica's basketball after school a guy was asking me about Monica's personal bests. He couldn't believe that I didn't know what her top baskets in one game were at that point she had 18 points. He said that you have pb in any sport and if she did stuff like that in a sport like track, she would have to know. I said she did do Track and she didn't know her personal best in that either. He said he didn't believe that she wouldn't know herself but when I asked her later she had no idea. Monica just likes to compete. I got a call that April was going to the hospital, she had fallen downstairs. Poor kid was at the hospital for about 4 hours with James. She hurt her ankle badly and even though they x rayed it they said we should go back in a couple of days because the foot was at a weird angle. It is so swollen it is the size of a golf ball. I had to take Monica to volleyball after so I never got to see her until after 10. Annie at 1/21/2003 04:47:00 a.m. Amy, Sullivan, Brent and Stacy all slept in the basement and it really bothered James and I. Stacy has had friends overnight when Brent has and I never have had to say anything about it, I just knew that the girls would come upstairs in the family room when it was time but they didn't this time. This kind of thing is making me want to cut out parties all together. I am confused about Sullivan, I saw him watching Carlie (and vise versa), at the party the other night but then I know they are friends and they did at one time just before Dan, go out, but then I saw him looking at Stacy too, so I figured that is just the way he is. I kind of have the feeling Brent's friend Sullivan is hitting on Stacy. I don't know, hopefully he likes Amy but they shouldn't have all been downstairs. I told James that I thought Sullivan likes Stacy and he says that he doesn't think so (am I being paranoid because Steve was saying how highly he thinks of Stacy too?). Anyway, the girls should not have been drinking with a stranger (Sullivan) even if it is a friend of Brents he is still a stranger to them. I thought I made my point clear on drinking with people you don't know years ago. It breeds familiarity and the person thinks they are buddies with the other when they really don't know each other at all. Not a good way to meet people. We have to make a point of making sure Brandon Alexio gives us his keys if he is planning to have drinks. He left without us knowing last night. Amy was late for work, I think she drank a lot last night, too much. Sullivan made Brent and Stacy a big breakfast; he used to be a cook. He seems like a nice guy, I know all the girls think he is really good looking and he looks mother friendly (really cute but not rugged handsome) except for his eyebrow ring, but it suits him. I met him for the first time a couple of years ago-----, when he was a short skinny awkward looking 15 year old. He has put on at least 50 pounds and a foot in height since then and he acts very self assured. But I just don't know. He is looking at Stacy a lot but then other guys do too. Brent says that he has a girlfriend so I hope he isn't going after Stacy. I don't know if he has a reputation for doing things like that. Brent's friends hung around here most fo the day, it wsa good having them all, they are a smart entertaining bunch of guys. Sullivan seems to be an interesting person, by that I mean some of the conversation I hear is making me think. Steve was sitting on Sullivan's back, they were talking about how they both were very short in the earlier high school years, were picked on and then suddenly grew alot. I always thought that gave people a different perspective on life, adds character to a person when they see life from two sides. Makes them a better person with the exception of Dave Kegs who says he was a little runt and then when he finally grew he gave back what he got! Nadia went out to a movie with Natasha, the same one that Monica saw and Nadia says that she didn't like it because it was too adult so she probably didn't understand it. Brent went to a movie later with his buddy's. My kids were all teasing Monica at the supper table about her tattoo, saying that if you had a hickey that is how you would hide it. Monica's face went red about it. Finally she told me secretly that it was a hickey. Cory wanted to try it and he tried a couple of times and they didn't think it worked and then she freaked out when she went to the mirror. She tried to hide it after she came back from Cory's to go to soccer. That is why she was late for soccer. I hate to think of her growing up to fast. I am glad Monica told me on her own, I never even tried to get it out of her. Last night, Monica and April were arguing about giving this guy named Alan another girl's email and - doesn't want to and that is her business. Monica was bugging her about it because Alan was asking her to ask April for it. This Alan guy is somehow getting in between my girls, I don't trust this guy at all. He is the grade 8 guy that people tell me talks about Monica and that started to talk to April at the last basketball game. I don't want any trouble with my girls because of him. email for Jodi Subject : I HATE BIOLOGY he he he... NO! geez... what do you think i am? ...although that Sullivan kid is pretty hot. (im sure Stacy already told you that one) just send me pics of everyone! the whole gang please. Annie at 1/20/2003 04:49:00 a.m. Its too bad I am so allergic to cats cos I'm feeling pretty low. James actually thinks it's a hangover but I know better. HA. I drank most of a Bubba of Beer and my stomach really hurts, so does my head. James is teasing me about the Bubba. What a waste of a day. The adults at the Doobie Brothers party were more out of control than the kids after we left, knocked a fire detector out of the ceiling and broke a chair or something, but took the berthday boys and gang out for breakfast the next day. Stacy's work phoned, there was no one in babysitting and it took a while for us to figure out that it was probably her week to baby sit so she went in. Colleen feels terrible about reading Holly's diary last November and says she hasn't done it again. I don't know about that, if it is true or not but she wants me to believe that she isn't. She wants Holly to trust her so much and she doesn't want her to ever know she read it. She says she will never do it again. I am glad that we had that talk in November when I told her how important it was to not read her diary, that Holly needs an outlet to express herself. Colleen wants so much to be close to Holly, for her to be trusting enough to tell her about her day, and that would have ruined her chance at being close to her. Monica went to the movies with Holly and Colleen after soccer. She cut it pretty close to being late for soccer, she was at Cory's. She put a round red tattoo on her neck and everyone thought it looked like a big old hickey. She says she put it on in the morning but April says that it was impossible, she would have seen her do it. HMMMM. April stayed over at Erin's tonight. She was supposed to have the basement but Chelsea changed her mind about coming over here (she knew I was upset about yesterday) so April let Brent have people over. April felt bad that Tara was going to be alone because Chelsea ditched her, Erin already had enough people coming over so she came to soccer to be with Tara. Stacy and Nadia had a fight, which is unusual, they usually get along so well. It was about cleaning and then Derrick phoned to say he didn't want to do anything tonight so Nadia stayed in her room upset all evening. Stacy was trying to get Nadia to clean for Brent's party. I don't know why Stacy has agreed to clean for Brent when he hasn't put any effort into it. It is not like her friends are coming. Jessie can't go to social things right now because Hannah is nervous about him hurting his collarbone. Brent and his friends went to Casey's for supper and then Brent had people over tonight but they were pretty quiet. James and I still stayed up until most of the people left. Brandon Alexio had something to drink so we tried to get his car keys from him but now he is staying over. I was surprised at Stacy, she was drinking, some banana concoction and she is not known for drinking at all. The only change in the equation is Sullivan so I hope she is not doing it to impress anyone. Amy and Sullivan and Brandon Alexio slept over here tonight. Annie at 1/19/2003 04:36:00 a.m. The Doobie Brothers surprise 19th birthday party. Woohoo! Brents group are turning legal!!!Yeah!!!!!! I am honoured to be one of the few parents that they invited. They had told all their freinds that if there was something going on for their birthdays that James and I were to be invited so we came! The cat never touched me but my throat got so swollen that I could barely talk at the end of the night. I was happy to see pictures from my camera posted on their fridge. Jodi is close to them, a result of our semi party on Dec 14/01. Jodi is good at networking herself and has many friends other than the group that I know. Because of this she is invited to a lot of places and travels with different people too. Jodi was invited, Amy was not. I never see Amy try for new friends and this is unfortunate because often I think that she relies on Stacy for her own fun. I think she resents Jessie, as her social life is through Stace. There is only one guy that she has been interested in that I know of, but nothing has ever materialized. I don't even think she has brought him to her group of friends. I might be wrong but I would be surprised. She also doesn't have the support of her parents as far as dating goes. Her mom has told me that she wasn't allowed to date until she was 18. Chelsea and Tara came over to the The Doobie Brothers party, which really irritated me. They were to do something with April. They had planned to go to the dance with April and then they said they didn't have any money, but turns out they really did have money. They asked me for a ride to the arena, I said no I am going out to a party. When April mentioned that I couldn't drive because I was going to the The Doobie Brothers's party, they asked if they could go and I said no, it is for a 19 yr old and I can't invite them to someone else's party. Then they said that they were going to walk to the arena. That is so dumb considering it is fucking frigid cold outside - 17 degrees I think. But they came anyway, little shits, leaving April at home???I phoned April and arranged for her to come by taxi because I couldn't think of her being stood up all alone. Brent's lips were pretty chapped, but he was feeling no pain and he was getting a lot of attention from different girls especially Melissa (I think his her name) but I won't ask him what's up. It is not my place when we are at the same party to be nosey. The party was a lot of fun. Morgan was there and we had a long talk. He said that he knew I didn't care for his mom and that he always had problems with her too, I never told him what she put me through at all, you don’t put dpwn someone's mother. Morgan talked of how much he had liked Stacy when they were growing up. Stacy came later after watching the hockey game with Jessie. His mom doesn't want him to go out to a party with his shoulder still bad so Stacy came alone. Steve still really likes her, he was telling me what a quality person she is. John (big Beard, little beard) threw up and a guy talked me into taking his picture when he was throwing up (apparently he had a reputation of never throwing up!). I don't want that kind of action shot and I only bother them with drunken pictures at my house so I deleted it. Talked a lot to cutie pie Jamie, he is always nice to talk with, and one of the mothers thought he was pretty hot and said "where were you when I was young". He has been going out with Meredith for quite a long time now and they look very good together. Sullivan was there- looks like he has put some weight on and is looking good, according to the eye goggling that girls were giving him. Harry commented on the fact that it was so cold out that it had to be a special kind of cigarette to get him to come outside! One of the girls told me that she knew I didn't like her! I didn't even know her, and she said that she had gone out with Adam a while ago and then I remembered the mouth. I told her that we didn't know her but she was yelling and swearing so much in our basement and we have younger children that we wanted her to keep quiet or leave. That was it. Adam wasn't there, I guess he doesn't feel comfortable with the group of guys yet. James said that my actions would always come back to haunt me. I got some slack for letting kids drink underage and in trying to defend myself I brought up the first time, when it was Brent and Dan on our camping trip. I was trying to teach them how to drink, because I had heard that Dan couldn't handle the alcohol. I thought I was teaching them as a favor so they wouldn't get that out of control. Dan had already been talked about from the time at Adam's when he got sick all over the place. I said that Dan had learned his lessons, because he hadn't gotten real wasted since my house when he was unconscious. Around that time Carlie entered the conversation and I felt bad that she must have thought we were all talking about her boyfriend but I was trying to defend my actions, not his. Dan came later, didn't drink at all, and was pretty quiet, upset that one of the parents mentioned his drinking. It was in poor taste, especially since the parent was very drunk himself. But it is a known fact that Dan has been 'out of it' on a couple of occasions with drinking and I guess if you play the game, you get the name. We all do. James and I left to let the kids party hardy, Stacy drove us home ......hic Annie at 1/18/2003 04:54:00 a.m. I have been worried about this Alan thing with April, I don't want her to get hurt in any way. If I have heard that he really likes Monica and I have heard it a lot, why would I encourage April to go out with him? I don't want any guy to get in between my family. I took April to lunch and we talked about differences in people and how she has advantages over some people in that she isn't shy and being able to talk to people and to make them smile is a huge advantage. I told her to stay away from the younger guys (sound familiar?) that look like they are trying to build a reputation. Monica phoned me and she was having a fit that I wasn't at home to feed her and take her back to basketball. If she had to get back for basketball and she was on a time thing then she should run home but she doesn't do that anymore, she socializes. I drove the whole Basketball team to Port Perry. I can't understand why we don't have fan support like other schools do. They won two games, lost one. We got home just in time for Monica to go to pitching clinic in Pickering. She keeps very busy, but James said her pitching was very good tonight. Annie at 1/17/2003 04:06:00 a.m. Monica and April were arguing about Alan this morning, apparently Monica has a lot of contact with Alan, she ambushes him in the halls everyday. I reminded her that there is a no touching policy and that she could get in trouble. I don't think that each of them wants the other to talk to Alan. I smell trouble! ---------------- MOM! Make April a DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT! Hopefully for the morning! It's for my finger and the needle! AHHHH! Also, Bring my forms 4 the Social Insurance Number...I need my birth certificate...or something like that! Well DON'T FORGET! --------------- Nadia's group got over zealous about the arranging of their semi formal dance for marks and used letterhead from the College when they didn't have permission. I had to run around like crazy today. Stacy with volleyball after school, work in the gym Monica basketball then to volleyball and drive Stacy to Jessie's and then drive Monica home. I Miss my James!!!! An impatient bitch at work yelled at Stacy today. She wanted a certain machine that she had signed up for and another person was on it. Even though there were 2 other ones available she interrupted Stacy's orientation with someone else and wouldn't shut up when Stacy was talking to the other girl who had mistakenly signed am instead of pm. She said that she had no patience for the girl or for Stacy. It looks like Jessie will have to have an operation on his collarbone; it really was a bad break. Poor Jessie. I know he will really miss hockey. It might be a very long time before he can play again. He lent Stacy his car so she can get to Curling which was so nice of him. We received a phone call from a favourite old teacher here tonight, I wasn't home. He talked to Brent, April and Monica. Monica told him how much he as missed as a coach. Annie at 1/16/2003 04:01:00 a.m. Basketball for Monica, the other team is so tall, mostly grade 8. A real tall man who was there with the other teams coach picked out Monica, said she was our best player and highly skilled. Brittany and her played well together, but unfortunately Brittany was hurt somehow. April came with me and was with the grade 8 boys (oh no, not the younger boys again). Time for a talk. Tonight April was on the Internet with the guy Alan from grade 8 who was at Monica's game today. He is the one who got suspended for a couple of weeks last month for strangling someone. Steven A teased him for being a wigger from Scarborough and he went crazy on the kid. She likes him, but I heard he likes Monica. Maybe like is the wrong workd, he told people that the only hot girls in the school were Monica and Holly. I don't want any trouble between my daughters. Monica was at Cory's tonight, phoned at 10:45 and Sharon drove her home. Annie at 1/15/2003 04:53:00 a.m. email from Crystal I have not really been up to too much. Yea, I moved out for a bit but it was one of those life's learning lessons, and I am back living at my foster mothers again. I am glad to hear that everyone is doing so well. Except you didn't say too much about what is going on in your life. I am no longer working at the Horn. I don't remember if I told you that I need a biology course but I would like to go into massage therapy. I was hoping the coming September but it is not enough time to take the course and apply to college. I think that is really great that Stacy and Jessie are still together. That sucked about her New Years though. Mine was pretty crazy. I am not drinking much anymore, maybe I am outgrowing that phase. I still enjoy parties but I would just rather be sober. It is fun to watch drunk people when you're sober anyways. My car isn't working so I am really bummed about that lately. Anyways write me back, I enjoy know what is going on in that crazy busy house. Krista ---------------------- One of the Bee Gees died on the weekend and while I don't usually even think about a celebrity's death this one really bothered James and I. He was admitted to the hospital with an intestinal blockage, the same thing James had a year December. When they were trying to get the tube down James two other doctors were watching right behind me and were expressing concern about James’s condition, mentioned something about his heart and other measures they might have to take because at the time it wasn’t looking too good for James. Now we know what could have happened to him. The guy had to have stomach surgery and died from the stress of his heart. I forgot that Stacy had a volleyball game in Uxbridge. The Cooks were there watching so it would have been nice to see them. Lindsay drove them and they parked in the wrong area of the parking lot and caused a traffic jam. A teacher spazzed on them instead of trying to help them. Brent got a hard drive for school, an insert in any computer at school and one at home. I drove him to school and they sent him home because it wasn’t compatible so him and Adam went back later. Monica has to do a dance routine with two other girls at school so she was trying to pick a good dancing song. April and Stacy decided to help her. Stacy started to dance to the music and when they put Kung Foo Fighting on she was dancing so funny that I couldn't stop laughing. She was doing the motions of a sumo wrestler and kicking and just getting her freak on. I started to cry it was so funny. I emailed Hannah and note because I don't know what is happening with Stacy and Jessie but I thought that it would be my opportunity to thank Hannah for looking after her. I don't know how we can maintain a friendship if and when they breakup, it will be awkward despite how much we like them. The fact that Jessie is hurt right now really must be confusing Stacy about what she feels and how she should be feeling. ---------------------- Hi Hannah Thanks for inviting us to Mario's party, we had a real good time. We met a lot of very nice people there and you both have great families. I just wish that my camera had been recharged so I could have used my camera. Somehow it got unplugged! If you want I could scan your pictures for a dvd movie like Jamies, or scan them for you to email to other people. Thanks also for watching over Stacy for me. Her new found freedom with the car sometimes makes me nervous but as I explained to her, I trust her but there are alot of things that can happen out there that she has no control of, so we have to keep an eye on her! She still isn't feeling well but she slept alot today. Bye, Nancy ---------------------- Hi Nancy You are welcome it was great that you, James and the kids were able to come. It was a great time had by all. I will see when I get my pictures developed if they turn out maybe I will ask you to do that for me. No problem watching Stacy she means alot to us and we will always be there for her. Hannah ---------------------- Colleen and I have been contacting teachers and coaches so that we will not lose wrestling at our school Monica and Holly really love it. We found a high school coach that would help but now it looks like our coach is backing out. I don't understand what she is doing, why doesn't she just humour us and say she is going to do it. They will probably go on strike and cancel all the programs anyway so what is her big deal? Annie at 1/14/2003 04:49:00 a.m. Stacy said that she is not feeling well today so she didn't go to Mario's brother with Jessie for supper as planned. I think she bailed, didn't want to go, something is wrong. If she was feeling sick then she wouldn't have gone out after. It think she was thinking of ending things with Jessie and now that he is hurt, she feels guilty but she doesn't know how to feel. Stacy and Monica went to the OC to get my birthday present. Stacy was excited about it so gave me a blue pant suit now instead of waiting for my birthday. She is always very thoughtful but something is bothering her. She sleeps a lot when she is depressed (just like me) and she spent most of the day lying down. When I finally got her out of bed, Stacy was frustrated looking at the courses for university, deadline is close and she has to register on line. They still have her down as not completing her community hours. Paul down the street called on Brent at 2, didn't want us to wake him up but Brent went over to his house to help with computer problems. All that was the matter was the card was inserted backwards so the old saying when in doubt pull it out applies to computers too! Visited Gramma later she came for roast beast supper. My mom said it was too late. April mouthed off to us, a first in a long time. We are wondering whether Tara is a bad influence on her as she just spent a lot of time with her this weekend. I believe we already know the answer to that one. James is not sure when he is coming and going to Ottawa this week so my big home improvement plans will have to be when he goes to Mexico. He was going to go all week so I could have worked on my While you were out, surprise but now he is leaving on Tuesday and coming back on Thursday. The carpet people had a conflict , said they could put the carpeting in on Friday so it won't work this time. Annie at 1/13/2003 04:31:00 a.m. Zak was hit by car this morning. She darted across the street when she spotted someone throwing a ball in the park. She has a fracture in her hip so she won't be walking with us in the morning for a while. Its weird but yesterday Caesar darted out in the road and we realized that he can't be trusted off the leash near the road so we only let him off in the park. ------------------------- Hi mom it's Monica, I just got back from soccer and I'm going to Cory's now like I told you I was. Luv Ya! Bye! Call me when you want me to come home. ------------------------ April stayed at Tara's overnight. Brent went to Port Perry for a while and then out with Josh. Tonight was Mario's surprise 40th birthday party at Sports Gardens. James talked a lot to Mario's brother, and they had some shooters together. Nadia came too and she was fun to talk to and many people admired her Hockey Night In Canada hoodie. I told her not to wear it because she would be too hot in it but it turned out she was fine and everyone else was cold! She teased Mario that the SCRC on his shirt stood for Satan Choice Riding Club and he got a kick out of it becaeu it is not an outlaw club. We gave Mario a wooden motorcycle that we liked so much we wanted to keep it. Jessie was in a lot of pain and his shoulder looks lower and shorter, maybe because it is in a sling. Poor Jessie, he can't swallow pills so he swallows them after there grounded, euck. My camera wasn't charged so I missed taking pictures. Stacy is a thumb wrestling champion! Stacy was snuggled up behind Jessie, who is wearing a sling, to cuddle, the first sign of affection I have ever seen from them in public. It looked cute. Annie at 1/12/2003 04:25:00 a.m. Nadia's Go train was cancelled because of the snow, she didn't get out until 10:30. We drove her 3 times to the go train! It snowed in the night again making the traffic all tied up. The school hurdles coach and I had a long talk this morning. He told me that Holly was doing track, hurdles in fact, so someone is lying, Colleen or Holly? I wouldn't let Monica participate in basketball practice or gym today, her muscles are too sore and she won't tone down her intensity. Monica had her birthday party tonight and I was worried about it but every thing worked out in the end. All the kids that said they wouldn't come if so and so came all showed up. The only one who didn't was Jeff and he thought that everyone hated him even though Monica told him she wanted him there. I think he likes her still, from the email she showed me he said some things that shows he does. However she was not happy with a couple of the girls that are trying to conspire to tear Cory and Monica apart. Sam took all the boys chains but the one she kept holding up for people to see was Cory's so Monica went upstairs upset and came back down with her heavy artillery, the necklace and bracelet that Cory gave her- her secret weapon. You work it girl! April went to the movies with Dillon, Erin and Amy but they didn't all sit together. Some kids bailed on them and ended up at the movies so that was kind of uncomfortable. Erin was upset with a lot of the kids by the end of the night. April is so easy going that it didn't matter to her. Jessie broke his collarbone in hockey tonight and is out for the rest of the season. He got hit into the boards. They took him right away to the hospital. The goalie said that he heard it snap and he should go to the hospital. Stacy went to see him at the Sports Gardens, as soon as she heard he was hurt, which was very late but they met her at the door for me. Jessie seems to be handling it well but Stacy said you could see that it was bothering him. Derrick got his newspaper, the one where he is doing his placement, published and it is a hockey paper so it was nice to see his name in print as the managing editor. Nadia is at his house for the evening. Annie at 1/11/2003 04:21:00 a.m. I accepted Hannah's invitation to Mario's birthday party that she gave to me a long time ago. I wasn't sure if I should and I procrastinated until now. I asked Stacy if everything was all right, because I didn't want to put her in a bad situation with Jessie. She said we should go. Monica had 2 basketball games tonight. I was the only parent driver as usual but Sam and Holly's moms came to watch for a while. Colleen told me that Holly isn't doing track or anything so I told her that she told the basketball coach that she had to miss basketball for track. Colleen also said that the reason that Monica was shaking so badly after all the sports she is doing is that she is expelling so much energy and not replenishing and the body takes what nourishment it needs from the muscles so I have to make sure that Monica has enough calories in her. We had to turn the piano teacher away tonight and she wasn't too happy. There was a snowstorm which made her 20 minutes late for piano lessons. If we had let her come in we would have backlogged our pitching clinic. Monica was too sore to do the entire pitching clinic session. Annie at 1/10/2003 04:42:00 a.m. Brent was sick all day again. He went out to Josh's in the evening to help him with a computer problem. I went to visit Gramma this afternoon. There should be time in my life that I could visit both James and my mothers but I am so busy with the kids I really can't. I love my life the way it is now with my kids, my man, and my neighbours, I would like to squeeze in more but I can't. Cory was in a fight with Eric, one fo the twins. He punched Eric in the stomach after Eric snowballed him when he told him not to. Cory then punched him in the face knocking his glasses off and they couldn't find them. Adam rushed home to get mommy. Eric's mom wants $200.00 for new glasses. Sam is still interested in Cory and all Monica wants for her birthday is for her not to flirt with him. Monica says she no longer considers Sam a good friend. Sam is not coming to her birthday party. She kept telling her what day to have it and when Monica handed out the invites Sam said that she changed her mind she wanted her to have it on Saturday. Doesn't work that way. Jeff phoned and said that because Monica's best friend Holly won't come because he is coming then maybe he shouldn't come which was decent of him but Monica said that she invited him so he should come. I am worried about Monica's party with all the kids trying to change the date and uninvited kids and also with this fight happening. What a soap opera! James's company took on a new line. They will continue with their old line for another 3 months to clear up any unfinished business. There is no need to let them know that they are dropping them for a couple of more months. After the snowball fight Monica had volleyball, a lot of running involved and then a vigorous basketball game where she was fouled many times. She was shaking when she finished so I took her out for a drink at The Wing Place. --------------- Email from Crystal Hey it's me, sorry i haven't written in a while, i forgot to log on for a while and they closed my hotmail account. Anyways I was just wondering how you and the rest of the fam is doing. I’m sure you are really busy but I would love to hear how Christmas and New Years went when you get a chance. Crystal ------------------------------- Email to Crystal Hi Crystal, I wondered what happened to you! I sent you some stuff and it wouldn't accept your email address anymore. I was thinking of you this holiday season too, I phoned but she said that you moved out. She gave me your new phone number but I didn't know if me calling would be an invasion of your privacy so I am glad you emailed me. It was hard for me to get in the holiday spirit at first, but with alot of help from my kids it all turned out. Stacy was really worried about her gift to Jessie, she ordered it off the internet and it didn't get here until the last day of December so he ended up getting it for his birthday and she found something else for Christmas. It is weird not having toys in the Christmas stocking but times are changing, they are all growing up on me! James and I stayed home for New Years, how about you? Brent went to a huge house party with a live band in St Catherine’s had a great time. Stacy went to a party that got crashed by the cops so she spent most of the evening outside! You never know how New Years is going to turn out do you? We have been to the Hunters Horn a couple times but not when you were working. We are trying to cut down on out Restaurant expenses this year because it sure got out of hand last year way too much $$$. April is in High School and doing well. Monica and her both entered a photo contest called a day in the life at school and Monica got first place and April got 4th- they were in the paper last month. April was very happy because she got to take pictures of 'the hottest guys at school'. Kids are actually emailing us to try and get copies of the pictures. She could make a fortune selling them!!! Brent is doing well at school, he likes it alot better than high school. He says he has tried to contact you to see how you were doing but could never get a hold of you. Anyway what are you doing with yourself lately, where are you living and is everything going ok? Thanks for emailing me I like to keep in touch with you. Talk to you later, Love Annie Annie at 1/09/2003 04:07:00 a.m. I went to the high school to give the latest pictures. I was waiting for the yearbook teacher at the wrong spot, turned around and there was April. I didn't go to her because who wants to see their mom at school, but she came to me. I am going to try to get pictures of the hockey team one more time. Brent was sick today. Monica had a rep volleyball game and again looked very impressive. We found out about this game yesterday at baseball when one of her teammates mentioned it, small world. James opened and ING account. James's finger is bothering him so much that he went back to the doctor. He has to go to a specialist. Monica is sore from all the sports being resumed. Holly says she isn't going to the basketball practice because of track.???? Annie at 1/08/2003 04:17:00 a.m. I went to take yearbook pictures for the High school Hockey team but I didn't realize the game was in Bowmanville. James was a good sport, drove me out there, and sat with Mario and Hannah. Some of the guys didn't want their picture taken and wouldn't budge but unfortunately the person who got cut off was Jake. Monica's first baseball practice and they do look good. We let her go to the first one so she could get to know her teammates. Nadia went on a snowmobile with Derrick at his place. He has the property for it being out in the boonies. Caesars so tired couldn't move as Zak and him were wrestling and jumping for hours. Annie at 1/07/2003 04:54:00 a.m. Stacy and Monica took the Christmas tree down today, I wish we could just dump the Christmas tree, it used to be so nice and now it is old tacky and butt ugly. We watched the Junior Canadian Hockey take silver, it was disappointing but fun to watch as a family. James knows one of the fathers of the players, Mat Stajun so that made it more interesting. Erin's grandfather died so we dog sat Zak and they played rough in our backyard for hours. Stacy finally took interest in looking at University and College in case she decides to go next semester. She doesn't want to be away from home. Annie at 1/06/2003 04:43:00 a.m. Brent worked on Steven and Lana's computer, they got the computer virus and Steven gave them $20.00 for it. With everyone always asking Brent for computer help it is nice to have someone paying him, even a few bucks helps. Stacy went out with Jessie and his family to Peterborough to watch his hockey game. After she went to dinner with Jessie from her Christmas coupons. I do realize what she has been saying that Jessie and her are never alone so this is a good present Carrie and Mark gave them. It is like there is always a chaperone with them and it is not my doing but Hannah and Mario's. I am starting to think that Jessie just goes along with what anyone plans, doesn't have any plans of his own. When Stacy and him go out it is because his buddies have planned it, not him. She must compare to Nadia and Derrick, when it was only Nadia doing the planning initially, and now Derrick does and he is also spontaneous, pops in on her at different hours too. I guess you can't help notice the difference. James and I went to Steven and Lana's in the evening. When we got there they were outside with there neighbors smoking up. Jackie came out looking for them and man could you smell it. They're kidding themselves if they think their kids don't know. They bought a new bedroom set, it is so nice. When I got home I had The Talk with Monica, she had just come back from babysitting and was feeling very grown up and responsible. She was very receptive, I believe her and not everyone that is spreading rumors about what she and Cory are doing. She really needed me to talk to her about sex. I am sure we will have many good talks in the future. Annie at 1/05/2003 04:48:00 a.m. Stacy started her work for a new session tonight. It snowed all night so driving was hard but I braved it when I drove Stacy and her friends to Jamie's hockey game. We met up with April so she stayed for Jamie's game instead of going back with Erin. Our neighbours were there for skating but stayed with us to watch Jamie's game. They really enjoyed seeing the older boys play. I saw classic April in action last night. Amy was cutting her short and saying mean things to her so April decided to act up, it is her defense mechanism and she embarrassed Stacy by doing things such as making little farting noises with her glass. I wish Stacy had of realized what Amy was doing to her and stood up for April instead of just seeing the end result. I am finally finished my month long period- yeah! I'm doing the Snoopy dance! Brent went to go find Doober who was going naked tobogganing in Oshawa, he didn't find him but found Morgan. He got into a push fight with a guy, as they tumbled down a hill the other guy's friends kicked snow on their friend. I don't think that Brent who was intimidating, but Brent's 6'6" sidekick! Annie at 1/04/2003 04:41:00 a.m. Brent was at his old childhood friend Ian's old house tonight visiting a new friend of Doober's. They found the butt mark impression from when Brent was little where Ian pushed Brent through the drywall into the closet wall is still there. They all thought it was funny. April didn't do anything today, not even waking the dog. I adn even hear her eating right now and that is way to late. I am not going to let her be that sedentary. Brent and James exchanged the DVD player and the new one really works well. Monica took him on a good one this morning to make up for not walking him yesterday. I am going to have to have the talk with Monica tomorrow. She is 12 years old and Nadia walked in on them in the basement today and there is only one reason that you scatter when someone comes down there. Monica's hair was all messy and Cory was so scared he hid behind the post. We aren't stupid. I am not looking forward to it because she is only 12 years old and they have got too close. Unfortunately, we kind of looked the other way for a long time, thinking that nothing could happen but they are together all the time so ...Monica wouldn't admit to anything, even to kissing him. Annie at 1/03/2003 04:44:00 a.m. New Years Resolutions To try and have more friends over, we usually go out with them but instead I would like them to come to our house. Now that we have an exercise room I would like everyone to use it regularly and for everyone to walk the dog every day. I had nightmares all night, I guess I am nervous about Brent being in Niagara Falls. I hope he had a good safe time. Stacy came home around 1:45 last night, disgruntled; her new years tainted by the same familiar disappointments as they have year after year. New Years has always been spoiled somehow, never lived up to her expectations. They spent the majority of the night outside in the cold so she was chilled to the bone. One party didn't materialize so they had to find there way back from the Mall area to Drakes mothers. There were about 40 partiers inside, packed into small spaces with many rooms off limits. Drake was trying so hard to maintain order but he made the crowd feel claustrophobic. They were like bulls in a china shop and something had to give. Stacy helped out Drake with problems like spilt drinks; he was uptight but extremely grateful that someone would take the time to help him out. Mat poured a drink on Frank so there was some bad feelings there and they exchanges blows in the good room. They all ended up getting kicked out and as they spilled out into the night the cops were waiting outside. Stacy phoned me, upset that Jessie was acting all mad towards her and she didn't understand what was going on with him, just that he was drunk. She wanted to leave him there and come home, but I told her she had to try and take care of him. All she could comprehend is that he was being mean. He is having trouble handling himself where booze is concerned but I said for her to at least try to help him out and if it didn't work out I would come and get her. I have talked to Hannah about this before, she says that Stacy is not his liquor control board but I know how bad she would feel if something happened to him when she wasn’t there. Later on outside Shane mouthed off to a cop and the cop came back and thought it was Jessie until Stacy showed that he was on the phone with his mom trying to get a ride. She was able to help Jessie out of that situation, but that is something that he would probably be too drunk to remember. As long as she can be there for him when he was in that shape, then she has done her job as a good girlfriend, as far as I am concerned but they have to look out for each other. Jessie has a good heart too, like my daughter but the drinking is wrecking it for them. The police turned to Shane and he ended up getting roughed up. He was so mad that he wanted to phone his brother to beat the cop up so Coral took the phone from him. Good that Coral doesn't just let things happen like a lot of girls do, she was looking out for her boyfriend too. They ended up in the Park. Jessie was upset that he couldn't calm Shane down. The thing that Jessie has to realize now is that he will be treated different by the cops, he can get charged as an adult so he has to be careful even of what his friends do, he is now responsible. James, Stacy and I went to Hannah and Mario's for the afternoon and supper. Hannah's brother and family were there too. I think we are in an awkward spot or at least we have put Stacy in the spot. I think that she is disillusioned with Jessie and she probably wouldn't have wanted to see him today and maybe even fight about what happened last night but James and I had been invited to Jessie's birthday today with her. We have become friends with Hannah and Mario and we really enjoy their company. It is his birthday so she probably would have let the mad feeling go to celebrate his birthday, I don't know. She didn't even sit with Jessie at first, came and sat with me. The seating arrangements were awkward so I suggested that she should sit with Jessie but then she looked uncomfortable being beside him. I guess I feel guilty that maybe there relationship isn't right, but she feels trapped because we have become friends with his parents. Jamie's arm was sore from his birthday beating last night from Shane. Jamie's Aunt said something to the effect that they were all surprised that Jessie got such a good looking girlfriend which bothered me because I didn't like him being put down. I got a hold of Brent around 7:00; he arrived home about 6 (from St Catherines). There were about 50 kids at a house party with a live band. He really enjoyed it. He heard rumours about the party Stacy went to that some kids got fines for drinking which is apparently true. Brent was telling us that there were some attractive twins at the party that were very nice to him. He slept on a small loveseat and there was a pole by his head and every time he moved he would hit his head on the pole and wake everyone up. April came home from Erin's fairly late in the day because they stayed up until morning. She had Erin and Marina over and they went camera happy. Annie at 1/02/2003 04:54:00 a.m. Brent woke up very good natured today, and wrote up a list of how to get rid of the virus. Holly came home from her trip and spent the day with Monica. Monica didn't want her to stay in the evening, she is disillusioned with her because she doesn't do anything only talks about shopping and girly stuff. So Monica stayed a home when she had the opportunity of staying overnight with Holly. Nadia gave her one of her smoothie drinks for New Years so she was pretty happy. April went to Erin's for New Years, there was six of them, the others switched parties at the last minute. Stacy went out not knowing where they were actually partying. Luckily, Coral was able to get the car so I feel safe for them. When they phone right after midnight it sounded like they were at the side of someone's house while the cops were inside the house. I told her to go find Jessie. Hopefully she will be all right and home soon. Brent went to Niagara Falls to a party with Doober and Steve. We were nervous about them going because they won't know anyone but they are staying at some girls home and James knows people there. He phoned in the evening to say he ok and the house party had a live band so I hope he has fun. Nadia waited for Derrick to get off of work and he got off at 11 after 13 hours of straight work so he is very tired and his feet are sore. They had some fancy drinks and then are staying downstairs for the night. Have to go celebrate now! Annie at 1/01/2003 04:55:00 a.m.
|